World According to Gabriella: March 2008

Okay, so we really have no clue what we're doing when it comes to parenting. Really. Half of what we do is based on gut, and half is based on what we read. (Actually, it's probably more like 85% gut, 15% what we read.) We're winging it, basically. My attitude is that we can't screw her up more than we've been screwed up. (Kidding Mom, and Lola!) No really, our attitude is that we're gonna do the best we can and that as long as we love her and throw in some discipline and limits here and there, she'll be okay.

The other day I realized that she is getting taller and might be able to reach the oven knobs soon. I've read and re-read about how we need to baby-proof the home. So, I opened up the box of "knob protectors" from Babies-R-Us to prevent her from being able to turn on the gas. After installing these safety features, Gabriella discovered what great toys they make. Now she can't control herself from trying to reach for the stove knobs and play with the protector. Prior to me installing these, she could have cared less. Sigh.

Sleeping. Again, we have no clue what we're doing. She doesn't sleep, she's never slept. If your baby does sleep well, please don't email me about it. I get it, I get it. Your baby is wonderful, you get a great night of sleep, I hear you. Gabriella.... not so much. She is now almost 13 months and still wakes up anywhere from every hour, to every 3 hours each night. To try and manage this, we now co-sleep. She sleeps between Stew and I every night. When she wakes up, she'll sit up, begin crying (which, at 3am, sounds like screaming,) nurses a little, and then goes back to sleep...sometimes sideways (head on me, feet on Stew.) [I used to be a bed hog. I was the type to stretch out across the bed... sleeping on my back with my legs sprawled out and my arms above my head...ahh...comfort... Now I'm lucky if I get to have my head on the pillow, rather than the nightstand.] This sleep stuff is all based on gut. I figure, she 's not going to be 16 and still in bed with us, this has to come to an end at some point.

Even with all that... I wouldn't trade this for the world. It's 4:50am as I type this. Another sleepless night. But I can't complain. I love being next to her - day or night. I love that she wakes up in the morning and sees me, then turns to look for Stew, saying, "Da da;" I love when she sits up in bed in the middle of the night, looks for me, then throws her head on me dramatically; I love how she scoots close to Stew or I when she's trying to get comfortable (she curls up like a little lima bean next to our chest or back;) I love her smile first thing in the morning. While sharing a bed has it's downfall (e.g. reduced sleep and space) I really do love being near her.

So, we're figuring things out slowly.

I can't believe I just wrote that! No we're not! We're winging it. As she changes I'm perpetually trying to catch up and understand what I'm supposed to be doing. I think that's what I've figured out. As parents, Stew and I can expect 20 more solid years of trying to catch up.

At least that's what my gut tells me.