Things I Already Miss

I realize my girls are growing fast. I see it every day- a new tooth on Brianna -increasingly sophisticated humor by Gab, etc. I've been getting a little wistful lately. I love them so much but time seems to be passing me by way too quickly and I'm struggling to fully appreciate every little morsel of their childhood. I'm actually already missing some of the little things that I know will be gone in a flash:

1. Makeshift and hectic dinners, at one table, in one house. No plane tickets to arrange, no work schedules to adjust. Everyone together - a little stressed - a little tired - sometimes cranky - coupled with conversations about preschool, lentil beans behind ears, and dress attire that includes sometimes half-naked, pajama clad kids.

2.Being asked, for the 8th time that week, "Mommy, where is the fire engine going?" Having a little person look up to me, believing that somehow, someway, I actually know where every fire engine is going...even though I always have to say, "I don't know honey, maybe there's a fire or someone is hurt." No matter what, she always asks again, wishing and believing that I may actually know this time.

3. Bedtime routines that include bookreading, kisses, races to the bathroom ("I'm gonna win, I'm gonna win!") to get to the toothbrush, and tucking her in with her favorite 'green blanket', ("soft side please.")

4. The sound of little feet walking down the hall... knowing it's Gabby not just because of the lightness of her step, but because of the pace -- "walking" is really a half-run...everywhere.

5. The endless smell of urine. I know this sounds like a strange one, but Gabriella has had a difficult time with 'accidents' ever since Brianna arrived on the scene. The other day Stew was taking Gabriella into preschool and as he was putting her in the carseat he noticed that her pants were wet. "Gabriella, did you pee your pants honey?" To which she responded, "Just keep buckling me Dad!" Her accidents are sometimes a source of pride, and other times embarrassment. So combining her continual accidents and the fact that Brianna is still in diapers, the smell of urine now evokes positive feelings.

6.Toys under my feet. Cheerios at the bottom of my car. Crayons in my purse. A diaper in our glove compartment. Paint brushes in every crevice of our house.

7. And the thing I probably miss the most already, only because I know it will be gone way too soon... is having two little girls respond to me with almost an equal show of love to what I have for them. When I pick them up from preschool Gabriella runs to me, arms extended, screaming "MOOOMMMYY!!" When I see Brianna after work her little face lights up with a huge grin and she begins to crawl over to me with a half-whimper of excitement.

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It's humbling for me to watch my heart run, walk, crawl in front of me in the body of these two beautiful little creatures. I suppose the last thing that I really already miss is being able to actually be with my girls - I actually get to see my heart, every single day - before I know it they will be off....

I love you Gabriella!
I love you Brianna!